Dad Made a Pinky Promise – An Explanation of Brexit.

Dad told the kids they could have whatever they wanted for Christmas. The kids said they wanted a Real Unicorn. Dad promised he would get them a Real Unicorn. It was a pinky promise, which meant that he absolutely had to do it. Then, when he realised what he had promised, he left, abandoning the rest of the family to sort out the problem without him.

Mum insists the kids must have their unicorn, even though initially she never wanted them to have it. Mum has made a knitted unicorn, but most of the family don’t like it. They say it is rubbish and it is not a Real Unicorn, and they won’t let Mum give it to the kids. Grandad says it is worse than no unicorn at all.

Big Brother has found a Real Unicorn for sale on the dark web, but it is so expensive that they would have to sell the house and become homeless in order to buy it. Nobody in the family wants to be homeless, except Granny, who says it would be worth it for a Real Unicorn. Grandad doesn’t believe that selling the house to buy the Real Unicorn would make them homeless. He says that is Project Fear, and he thinks that they would have a wonderful life if they had a Real Unicorn. Granny and Grandad think they should just go ahead and sell the house and buy the Real Unicorn from the dark web.

Big sister thinks they should go back to the kids and ask them if they really, really want a Real Unicorn for Christmas, even if it means becoming homeless, but Mum says they can’t do that because Dad made a pinky promise about the unicorn, and she doesn’t want to make the kids cross.

It’s now Christmas Eve, and Aunty wants to go and tell the kids that they won’t be able to have their Real Unicorn until the New Year, but Mum doesn’t want to do that because Dad made a pinky promise about the unicorn, and Mum doesn’t want to make the kids cross. She thinks she can knit another unicorn which would be better than the first knitted one. But Aunty points out that it took Mum two and a half years to knit the first rubbish unicorn, so she probably won’t have time to knit a better one by tomorrow.

Everyone except Granny and Grandad secretly thinks the best thing would be to go and tell the kids that it is not possible to have a Real Unicorn, but because Dad made a pinky promise, nobody will say it. They are all secretly cursing Dad for making a pinky promise and then leaving them to sort out the problem.

Image result for unicorn

Advertisements

1 thought on “Dad Made a Pinky Promise – An Explanation of Brexit.

  1. But you left out the best bits:
    Dad knew they wanted a unicorn because he paid a market research company to get their secret diary data. They had a family rule that he could only spend a fixed amount on making pinky promises, but when the Russians bunged him a load of cash, he spent that and more of his own money than he was supposed to. And then he told the kids that if they didn’t have a unicorn they would end up with hundreds of Turkeys living in their house (and nobody called that project fear). But if they did get the unicorn then it would save them enough money to get grandad’s hip operation done privately instead of having to wait on the NHS. So it is really, really obvious that the pinky promise was just a fraud, but no one in the whole family seems to have noticed this fact.
    And now Father Christmas is claiming that if they put him in charge of the family, he could get the unicorn tomorrow, because he knows where they live, and nobody else does. But when he tried to kick Dad out of the house, they just slammed the door in his face.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s